I’m Out Of It Today
by Tanner Olson
writtentospeak.com

I am out of it today.

These are the six words that just hit me in the head.

They are true.

I am out of it today.

I’m sitting in a second story hotel room in Central Wisconsin.

My thoughts are groggy.

My heart is back home in Nashville.

My mind is all over the place.

My soul is stuck in the gutter.

You get it.

The sun was out yesterday, but decided to take today off.

Today is one of those days where my mom would say we gotta make our own sunshine.

She used to say this when the clouds were gray and the rain was constant.

I also think she could see the light begin to fade in my eyes and the darkness set in.

I’ve had two cups of coffee today.

No cream. No sugar. Black coffee.

With each sip I tell myself it’ll do the trick.

But today’s coffee is not a magician.

It is an imposter.

I know how it feels.

On days like this I also feel like an imposter.

I feel far from who I want to be, from who I am.

I’m wearing all black, but I do not feel like a poet.

I’m typing away on the computer, but I do not feel like a writer.

I’m texting family and friends, but I do not feel like I belong. 

I’m in the same room as a friend, but I feel alone.

Again, those six words.

I am out of it today.

And that’s why I am holding onto these eight words:

Today is today, but today is not forever.

Tomorrow is coming.

And perhaps tomorrow the sun will decide to show its face and the coffee will be a magician.

With hope,

Tanner Olson
@writtentospeak

About the Author

Tanner Olson is an author, poet, speaker, and podcaster living in Nashville, Tennessee.

He is the author of I’m All Over the Place, As You Go, Walk A Little Slower, and Continue: Poems and Prayers of Hope.

You can find Tanner Olson’s books on Amazon.

His podcast is The Walk A Little Slower Podcast with Tanner Olson and can be found wherever you listen to podcasts.

Tanner Olson travels around the country sharing poetry, telling stories, and delivering messages of hope.

You can follow Tanner Olson on Instagram (@writtentospeak) and Facebook where you’ll daily find encouraging words of faith and hope.