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grace

You were there before my first breath met the light.

When I arrived my blurry eyes grew wide as I kicked and cried, and some days, I’m still kicking and crying as I wonder how and why? 

I’m always wondering how and why. 

How is this for me?
Why are You for me?

And I’m beginning to believe I should leave the wrestle and rest in the beauty of Your grace, rather than the sulk in the misery of my mess and mistakes.  

These blurry eyes are beginning to see clearly that there is nothing I can do to save my soul, but You’ve done what I could not do and you say, “it was all for you.”

And it’s the endless grace I’ll never fully grasp or how You can look at my faults and cracks and still invite me back.

It’s the moments of failure I replay in my mind, but You know everything and have somehow forgotten those, leaving my wrongs behind. 

You say, “welcome home” despite who I have been while I’m alone and in the end, I will be home because of grace and grace alone.

.. .. ..

With hope,

Tanner Olson

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